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<< Swisher's HR in ninth boosts Yankees over Orioles
Bronx, NY (Sportsbook Betting Lines) - Nick Swisher's one-out, two-run homer in the bottom of the ninth lifted the New York Yankees to a 3-2 victory over Baltimore in the finale of a three-game set. Koji Uehara (1-1) began the home

<< Warriors sign swingman Carney
Oakland, CA (Sportsbook Betting Lines) - The Golden State Warriors have signed guard/forward Rodney Carney, the team announced Wednesday. No terms of the deal were disclosed. The 26-year-old Carney played in 68 games for Philadelphia

<< Zvonareva lands in U.S. Open semis
Flushing Meadows, NY (Sportsbook Betting Lines) - Russia's top player, Vera Zvonareva, was a straight-set quarterfinal winner Wednesday at the 2010 U.S. Open. The seventh-seeded Zvonareva reached her second straight Grand Slam semifinal by handlin

<< Mets take rubber contest of series with Nats
Washington, DC (Sportsbook Betting Lines) - Nick Evans' pinch-hit double in the seventh inning drove in the winning run as New York upended Washington, 3-2, to capture the rubber match of a three-game set. Luis Hernandez went 2-for-4 with a

Portland Meadows gains recognition with bonus program >>
Portland, OR (Sportsbook Betting Lines) - Little known Portland Meadows will gain some rare notoriety with the advent of the new Black-Eyed Susan 2.2 program. The track's first ever running of the $80,000 Portland Meadows Oaks has been include

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NEW YORK (AP) -Smell the tailgate party - it's college football season. But if you're flying in for a game, you might be headed for a headache. Cutbacks at major airlines have made flight choices more difficult this fall, especially to smaller colle

Former Sugar Bowl executive director dies at 72 >>
NEW ORLEANS (AP) - Mickey Holmes, executive director of the Sugar Bowl during the period when coaching legends Bear Bryant, Vince Dooley and Joe Paterno won national championships there, has died. He was 72.Sugar Bowl spokesman John Sudsbury said Ho

Rogers has high expectations for season >>
GREEN BAY, Wis. (AP) - During training camp, Green Bay Packers quarterback Aaron Rodgers noted that the team has a different kind of swagger this year. He calls it ``real confidence.''Now that Rodgers enters Sunday's season opener in Philadelphia as

FOOTBALL TRASH TALK

Trash talk has a place in every competitive endeavor (except baseball; those stirrup-wearers are too busy chewing on their sunflower seeds and their supplements to worry about what their opponents are doing).

Fantasy sports is no exception. Any intelligent discussion of the subject would probably start with a thesis statement or a definition of terms. Thankfully, this wont be an intelligent discussion.

Let me just say that I am happy to take a place in this space alongside my talented colleagues, even our commissioner. (You should see how she bleats like a demented paper boy about league fees on our fantasy site).

Trash talking, I would argue, is primarily about amusing your friends, their sheeplike demeanors and sloping foreheads notwithstanding. The best place I have found for football trash talking is at www.SportsAlarm.com.

Beyond the entertainment factor, though, I would recognize that the sophomoric ritual has one advantage, when properly applied. It magnifies your fantasy triumphs and mitigates your fantasy failures by transforming the eventual point total into an afterthought. Winning makes it seem like your opponent really is a truss-owning, lapel-pin-wearing nitwit. And in defeat, trash talk can be the air bag to break the fall from your hyperbolic heights. The plug-necked yahoos on your team, you can say, will be sacking groceries by the end of the season.

The best trash talk, in my view, is layered and nuanced. And it doesnt focus only on your opponents team. It picks apart your opponent. The idea is to create a shock-and-awe-scale blizzard of nonsense, and the goal is to make your opponent drop his hands from his keyboard in exasperation.

What team does your opponent root for? Accuse a Giants fan of having a Joe Namath pillowcase. Wheres your opponent from? Give a look of concern no matter his reply, then say, I'll try to type slower for you next time. Is your opponent into politics? Label everyone a tax-and-spend corporate shill.

Cap all that with a liberal application of irrelevance. For instance, dont just conclude by saying your opponent is a twerp who drafts like my grandmother. Say that your opponent is a sweater-wearing, eyebrow-plucking twerp who drafts his team about as well as Zsa Zsa Gabor gave acceptance speeches at the Oscars. By the time your foe makes sense of that, his starting running back will have had puppies.

But what about you? Hmm? Recall a memorable slam? Have a tried-and-true technique? Know someone who seems impervious to insult? Take a moment and tells us about it. Put together some (fit-for-publication) thoughts. You wont be too busy returning phone messages from your friends, Im sure, to reply.

In addition to the trash talking, the Sports Alarm has a huge gallery of high resolution pictures of beautiful women and models in bikinis. The most popular models are: Lindsay Lohan, Carrie Underwood, Alessandra Ambrosio, and Paris Hilton.